Growing Up

Ezra was a little newborn baby once. Then all of a sudden he turned into a toddler. Every stage is so exciting, but if I stop to realize that while entering a new stage that also means we have forever passed a stage, I can't help but feel baby hungry. Not for just any baby, baby Ezra.

I was thinking today how bad I feel for Ezra sometimes because he had to be my first. I am making the most mistakes with him and vowing to not repeat them, but poor Ezra is already doomed. I'd feel that way no matter which baby I had first. Don't you ever just wish you could know and do everything exactly right? Exactly the way God would want you to? Though I will admit that it is in those moments of mommy mistakes that I come to love my family and my Savior so much more. Not to mention, Ezra is so forgiving. He doesn't care that I forgot to brush his teeth tonight. He doesn't remember me forcing him to change his diaper this morning. I hope he doesn't remember me trying to stay in bed as long as I could this morning even when he was begging me to get him ten different things. He doesn't remember for now that is...

Ezra has been begging to either watch Cars, Elmo or play the Wii every second of every day. James and I are trying our best to find other things to fill his time. We decided to sit down and play with play doh this week and Ezra got more into it than he ever has. The boy in him is really coming out the older he gets.

Daddy made a snowman...

And Ezra decided to knock it down. Poor James.

Who wouldn't love waking up to this face everyday?

Everytime I come in to get him he says, "hi" with the biggest smile and then points to something he has had his eye on while waiting for me to get him. I could just eat him.

Ezra's hair has been getting a little wild. I won't lie, I really like his long, fluffy do. I just don't like his mullet. So, today I went to wal-mart, bought a clipper set, and asked James to cut it. We have cut his hair several times in his life already, but his hair was so long this time that it was a little sad to say good-bye. He just looks so much older with short hair :(

Pre-cut

During cut- he sat like this watching mickey mouse for a good chunk of the time

And almost done! So sad.

This is the best $2 I have ever spent. He loved it, I loved and I couldn't stop laughing at him. Especially when he would hand me the ball and right when I threw it he would say, "miss!" I didn't always miss, he just has sass. Then he would score and get so excited.

"Did you see that?"

I don't usually like to complain about the stress of school and mommy life, but I think finally being able to see the end of the road is making me a little more anxious and stressed. I have been losing it too often. I feel like I am constantly focusing on homework and what I need to do to make sure I graduate and I haven't spent enough time at home or playing with Ezra. I just feel like I'm missing him grow up. I can't wait to graduate and wake up to an entire day spent with my baby. Maybe then I'll wish I was still in school, but I can't wait nonetheless. Ezra, please wait for me. Don't turn 18 in the next two weeks, please!

Allergy, Allergy, Go Away!

Just when we were thinking Ezra was growing out of his allergy, he reminds us that this superbaby's kryptonite still comes from cows. He was sick all last weekend and literally didn't eat anything! Okay, maybe a couple pretzels here and there, but he wouldn't try anything else. I made sure to load him up on any liquids including all the juice he kept asking for just to try to compensate. Well, yesterday he was feeling better, no fever and jumping all over everything. I decided to give him some mac and cheese, which he loves, so I knew if he was feeling well then he would surely go for that. He did eat some of it, but not too many bites in and his face swelled up, his eyes got red and itchy and on came the hives. I was so sad. I'm sure he was sad too.

Several months back James and I decided to give him milk in little increments each day to try to get him used to it. I guess that's what happened because the second we stopped, his allergy reappeared. I can't complain too much, because he did get to the point where he could tolerate almost anything except direct milk, so maybe there is still hope. My 4 year old niece is really allergic to dairy too, but she can't seem to tolerate even the slightest bit of milk. I just can't imagine living in a world where ice cream wasn't the cure to everything.

Why Women Belong At Home...

Tonight I attended my good friend's dance show. Since Ezra is sick we decided not to get a sitter and just have James stay home with him. Therefore, I went to the show alone. It was a little awkward, but I'm so glad I was able to go. It was an awesome performance!

However, when I got home this is what I found... The house was a mess, dinner was still on the stove, the oven was still on, Ezra is now sleeping in the same snot covered shirt he wore all day with unbrushed teeth, and James is right where I left him, on the bed reading. At least Ezra got a diaper change, blessing and many kisses from daddy amidst the chaos. That was the first time I have ever had anyone other than myself put Ezra to bed and I think it might be the last... James did point out that everyone is alive, so all hail King James. It just makes me laugh how oblivious he can be. I guess that explains why it seems to be easier for a man to relax than it is for a woman. Oh well, everyone is alive and it gave me something to laugh about.

Midterm Trouble

This morning I had geared up and prepared to take my online midterm. I was about 5 questions in when Ezra came strolling over to me wanting to play with the computer. Before I could block his hand he had already grabbed hold of the mouse and closed me out of my midterm. Of course I can't get back into it because the computer thinks I already took it which also means that I now have a zero. I e-mailed the teacher, but it is Saturday; what teacher checks their e-mail on a Saturday? Oh please be merciful! What a way to start the day. To top it off, Ezra is sick. It is so sad and as much as I wanted to be mad at him, his poor, sad, red eyes just make me want to hold him and make everything better. These kids. What do they do to us?

A Week In Review

Things that made me laugh...

Finding James' camoflauge collection hiding in his closet and then hearing him say he has more in his airsoft bag. He now has every size, but why? Who knows? boys...

Watching James make us smoothies and remembering the first time he made me a milkshake and it went all over him, the walls, cupboards, counters and ceiling! He put the spoon in the blender while it was turned on. Genius! He made a clean mess this time along with an extra tasty treat. It also made me laugh to watch Ezra down his small serving of James' smoothie in seconds!

Ezra put "Mouse" in his bumbo to feed him the chicken nuggets that he didn't want to eat. He thought it was so fun to make pretend eating noises and I thought it was too funny.

He was pretending to wash his hair with the bubbles.

Ezra learned to play the Wii this week and I'm embarrassed to say he has actually beaten me a couple of times! I love watching him play; especially when he holds both remotes and plays against himself...spaz! (It also makes me laugh that it looks like Ezra has a rattail in this picture.)

He has to have everything served to him in a bowl with a utensil. Even if he can't scoop it out with the spoon/fork, he will pick up the item and place it on the spoon himself. This is especially fun to watch if he's eating applesauce, oatmeal or yogurt.

I also laughed this week when:

I caught Ezra dancing

 He learned to sing the Elmo's World theme song

He drooled on my face while playing "airplane"

He climbed into the front seat of the car and pretended to drive as I was trying to get him out

He tickled the car while he was pretending to drive

He got frustrated when his puzzle pieces didn't fit upside down

He found my stilettos and can walk in them better than I can

He ate the tinfoil to get to the candy

I watched Ezra limp around because he had a toy hiding in the feet of his jammies

I caught him throwing all of his megabloks into the kitchen sink

Ezra let me paint his fingernails and then James caught me and got upset

James went outside to scoop up dog poop from all around our building and we don't even have a dog

He got grumpy doing this and almost threw up

James got excited when we found a booklight at Walmart and he's now allowed to snuggle with me and read while I sleep

I really could go on and on. I can't remember a day that I haven't laughed in so long and I am so thankful for my boys who make laughing daily possible. Love you both!

My Projects

Here is my first project for sewing. We had to make one pillow, but I couldn't make just one, so I made two! Everytime I would bring home the fabric Ezra would get so excited so I just couldn't wait for the project to be finished to let him enjoy them!

The first one obviously says "ezra" and the second one says "ABC" on one side and "XYZ" on the other.

Here are the backs. See how happy Ezra is to have his pillows!?

We had to make an apron out of a pant leg for my sewing class, so I thought it would be fun to do a camo one for Ezra. We went to D.I. and found camo pants, but when James realized they were his size he was really hesitant about letting me get them to destroy them. I won the battle and this is the result. It is a little big on him, but still cute. Who knows if he'll ever wear it in real life...

Here's the tag blanket I wanted to make when Ezra was a baby. This turned out to be the hardest project yet. I think I just had tricky fabric. Ezra is a little too old for it now, but it was still fun to make and there will be other kids to enjoy.

Other than these I have been fixing holes and tears in both of my boys' pants and such and I have many more projects I want to start as soon as I have the time! It's so fun to create!

A Date!

A date a date! We got to go on a date! This rarely happens. It is just so hard to leave Ezra and I sort of feel like I use up all of my babysitting options for class. My friend asked when she could watch Ezra and it just so happened that another friend of mine was planning a double date for us and them, so it was perfect! Ezra got to watch lots of Elmo, play with all their pretty, non-childproof decorations, and run (and twirl according to Liz) all around their house. James and I were able to enjoy a great dinner with great conversation without the worry of a whining toddler. It's hard to leave him, but a break is needed from time to time. James held my hand and I scooted in a little closer to him then I am normally able to do. Thanks Caley and Liz for making a date possible!! Dates do help me to remember why I liked my husband in the first place. I think maybe we'll go on a date more often. I mean, I guess that's why we're told to have weekly date night. There really is a great reason! okay, okay, deal. Well, we'll try to be better at least.

Sewing Machine!

I am the new sewing machine! AND I got a new sewing machine! My mother-in-law got it for me for my birthday since sewing is my new obsession. Well, it arrived today. It's so pretty and is so wonderful. So far I have made two pillows for Ezra. I'll take pics of them when he's not sleeping. I'm working on an apron for Ezra and a tag blanket that I planned on making for him when he was still a teeny baby, but I never had the proper tools. I love being able to make things. Aside from sewing I have also started on ABC blocks and other ABC decorations for Ezra. I guess he's more fun to make things for. My next assignment is to sew my husbands temple pants that have been 6-7 inches too long since we got married because we never got them hemmed. I'm a beginner, but have the heart of a seamstress- seam stress. What an ironic word... Okay, it's late, my machine has been put to bed and I must enter into the same fate for now.

New Blog

I have started a new blog. One thing I love to do is write. I love to write about what I love. I write songs, poems, sometimes stories, but now I want to write about my journey as a mom. I realize that not everyone wants to read mushy gushy or maybe sad mommy moments, so I have made this blog separate from this one and private for now. I have so many thoughts on being a mom and I'm ready to start writing them down.  I am willing to add anyone who thinks they might like to follow my thoughts on this journey.

"While I carry him, he carries me and my eyes are opened to a whole new beauty. Everything inside of me wakes up to love this little boy." -thatswhatmommysaid.blogspot.com

breathe in, breathe out

Today I was feeling frustrated as I sometimes seem to do. I was a little cranky with everything. James asked, "are you cranky with candy?" To which I replied "no." "Are you cranky with me?" To which I replied, "a little." "Are you cranky with Jesus?" To which I replied, "James, I'm not cranky with everything, just some things, ugh." Then I grabbed a piece of pizza and tried to solve my problems with food. James decided to try to teach me breathing exercises to calm down. Here is what happened:

J: You just need to breathe in the good air and exhale all the bad things.
K: No
J: c'mon, just breathe in good, exhale bad. You'll feel better. Let all the good fill your body and let all the bad things come out through your mouth.
K: (I begin to blow and I spit a chunk of pizza all over my husband. I began laughing so hard.)
J: Uuummm
K: You're right that does feel better.

I'm not kidding. I love spitting food or water at my husband. There is just something about actually following through with your secret, only slightly evil thoughts that does make everything better. My advice: The next time you're mad at someone, throw water on them. It's easy to clean, makes you laugh, and lightens the mood in a way no breathing techniques can.

(This story made it to the blog because James requested it. So for all you bloggers who now think I'm horrible, please know that James laughed with me.)